Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Audiobook Review: Close My Eyes by Sophie Mckenzie

  • Publisher: Macmillan Audio
  • Publication date: 7/9/2013
  • Format: CD
  • Length: 14 hours and 22 minutes
  • Read by:  Marisa Calin
  • Source: Audiobook provided by the publisher for review.
Purchase: Amazon | Audible | B&N | The Book Depository

I wake with a start from a bad dream. Anxiety clutches at my chest. Something’s gone . . . something’s missing . . . Beth . . . Always Beth . . .

When Geniver Loxley lost her daughter at birth eight years ago, her world stopped… and never fully started again. Mothers with strollers still make her flinch; her love of writing has turned into a half-hearted teaching career; and she and her husband, Art, have slipped into the kind of rut that seems inescapable. For Art, the solution is simple: Have another child to replace Beth. For Gen, the thought of replacing her first child feels cruel, nearly unbearable. A part of her will never let go of Beth, no matter how much she needs to move on.

But then a stranger shows up on their doorstep, telling Gen the very thing she’s always desperately longed to hear: that her daughter was not stillborn, but was taken away as a healthy infant. That Beth is still out there, somewhere, waiting to be found. A fissure suddenly opens up in Gen’s carefully reconstructed life, letting in a flood of unanswerable questions. How could this possibly be true? Where is Beth? And why is Art so reluctant to get involved?

As Gen delves into the darkest parts of her past, she starts to realize that finding the answers might open the door to something even worse, a truth that could steal everything she holds close. Even her own life.

With Close My Eyes, Sophie McKenzie weaves a breathless thriller that digs in its hooks without mercy and twists without warning, confirming her place among today’s most exciting new voices in psychological suspense.

My Thoughts

I think this is a book that can be taken totally different ways. I mean, I know all books are subject to the reader, but this one is so psychologically in depth. While some people will find the main character really dense, I found her to be so overcome with grief and broken down that it was almost impossible for her to see things clearly. It wasn't that she was dumb, but that she was so lost in her own mind that she didn't stop to think or rationalize basic things. Anyways, I will get back to that. This story was a maze of conspiracies and secrets. It is the type of book that I could imagine would make a really great psychological thriller movie. Yes, it was predictable, some of the characters made me furious, and it was a bit drawn out. I still really enjoyed it though. Had I tried to read it instead of listening to the audio, I don't think I would have liked it as much. This is one of those books that really makes you think. It takes your mind to so many dark places. While listening to it, I was able to ponder over my thoughts while still moving forward with the story.

Geniver is in a hole of despair from the beginning of this book. Having been through multiple tries of IVF and trying to conceive a baby after losing Beth, she is at her limit. She doesn't want to replace her lost baby, she can't go through the hurt and disappointment of anymore failed attempts. She will not give into her husband this time. Now, she learns from a stranger that her Beth is still alive. She doesn't know what to think or to believe. As she investigates it further, her friends and family think she is going mad. Things just keep happening that lead her to believe that it's true, and the more she digs, the more danger she is in.Through this all she also realizes how absolutely broken her marriage has become. Her only help is one of her husbands old friends who may have ulterior motives. She makes some really stupid decisions, but she will do anything to find her lost child. I don't see her as stupid at all. I see her as a mother who is so distraught that she can only think of getting her child back. Nothing else matters. She is so wrapped up in conspiracies and paranoia that she refuses to think about anything besides the mission she is on.

I won't really go into the other characters except to say that I felt that Art was a bit harsh with her. He was so dismissive of her feelings. As a husband who loves his wife, I thought he should be more supportive of her no matter what. I was instantly suspicious of him having something to do with it because of how he was so defensive and kept telling her she was going crazy. I was pretty suspicious of a lot of people in this book. Mostly the ones who just kept brushing Gen off and telling her she needed to move on. I get that it's been eight years, but the loss of a child does not just disappear. Especially when someone has given you a hope you never dared to have. Lorcan was about the only character that didn't drive me nuts, but I still didn't understand why he would just go through all the danger of things for a person who he barely knows.

Having listened to the audio, I want to say that I highly enjoyed it. I think the audio really added to the story. I was able to hear the emotions of the characters, almost feel the intensity of things. This narrator did a fantastic job at the different voices and I never had trouble knowing who was supposed to be talking. She really put the emotion behind the characters and made the story seem real.

This book was full of suspense, mystery (though easy to figure out), and emotion. The end I didn't really see coming, but I should have figured. I think I wasn't expecting an epilogue from a different characters POV. Some things that really bothered me about this book was the overuse of certain phrases. "I close my eyes." and "I hold my breath." were used so many times that I was about to throw my iPod out the window. I think that certain things like that tend to be more noticeable on audio. Also, the story probably could have been shorter and a thing happens that I just didn't care for at all. I think a lot of the things in it were unnecessary. This is a book that was really hard to write a review for and I might end up doing a vlog review of it in the future. There is so much to say about my thoughts. Overall it was an emotional read that really gets in your head, but I just didn't love it the way I hoped. 

*An advanced copy of this book was provided by the publisher in exchange for an honest review. I did not receive any compensation.


  1. Not sure I'd like this one by the way you describe it.

  2. Hmm, this sounds interesting but some thing about it makes me..nervous.

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